Sister, Sister

1.  All You Need Is Love by The Beatles

2.  Incense and Peppermint by Strawberry Alarm Clock

3.  Ruby Tuesday by The Rolling Stones

4.  Somebody to Love by Jefferson Airplane

5.  Brown-Eyed Girl by Van Morrison

6.  Don't You Care by The Buckinghams

7.  Up, Up and Away by The 5th Dimension

8.  How Can I Be Sure by The Young Rascals

9.  Don't Sleep In the Subway by Petula Clark

10. A Whiter Shade of Pale by Procol Harum

11. Alfie by Dionne Warwick

12. Everlasting Love by Robert Knight

13. Gimme Some Lovin' by The Spencer Davis Group

14. RESPECT by Aretha Franklin

15. Ain't No Mountain High Enough by Marvin Gaye

16. Devil With the Blue Dress On by Mitch Ryder & The Detroit Wheels

My leg surgery marked the beginning of about a four year span where many things happened in my life.  I think I'll just stay in this part of my life a little while and share more of these events. Today - the arrival of my sisters.

No - they aren't twins although many people tried in vain to see similarities that didn't exist.   We still chuckle about it today.  This is how you get two sisters without twinning - you adopt one and then your mom finds out she's pregnant!

My parents became foster parents and this decision made for creating some of the most memorable and life-altering times for me.  In March of 1967 we were told that an infant girl was ready to come to our home.  She showed up at our house in a little cardboard box only named "Baby Tiny."  I clearly remember the moment the box was placed on the table and I stood on my tiptoes and peeked over the edge at this new little creature who was invading my space.  I beheld the most exquisite little china doll I had ever seen.  I wanted to hold her!  I wanted to see her closer!  So I was situated on the couch with a pillow under my arm and Baby Tiny was laid in my arms.  She was so very small - the adults used the word "preemie" and I figured it was just another word for tiny.  Her hair was dark - soft curly wisps.  Her little face was perfectly round with an unbelievably tiny nose.  Her eyes were that amazing baby blue. And her lips were teeny - and rosy pink - as if someone had taken a fine paintbrush and painted them on.  I was in love!  My very own living, breathing, baby doll!  People always assume that I must have not liked it very much - this new baby coming and dethroning me from my position as baby of the family, only girl and princess supreme.  I don't remember any emotions other than complete love - even though she had colic pretty bad and would scream for hours.  She had charmed her place into our family although it was supposed to be temporary.  

As time went on we realized that giving her up would be impossible.  It wasn't customary for foster families to adopt the kids they fostered, however, we petitioned for adoption and were approved.  After all, we had named her - Tina, because it seemed the natural adaptation from Tiny - and walked the floor with her through her colic sessions, and she just seemed as though she was meant to be ours!  She fit right in!  What a relief to know we wouldn't ever have to say goodbye to her.

Somewhere in the middle of the adoption business my mother discovered she was pregnant! She told me later, when I was an adult, that they just hadn't been able to get pregnant after me and figured that they were done.  Surprise!  My sister, Brenda, was born in August, when Tina was just 5 months old.  I remember that I stayed out with my grandparents on their farm while Mom went to the hospital.  Would it be another boy?  I was so excited to know!  We got the call and, suddenly, I had two sisters!!  Two!!  Just a few months earlier I had been an only girl - now I had two sisters!!  Girls equaled boys now!  We were tied!  And we were a family of eight!

I had always wanted a big sister but that was impossible.  But, now, I WAS a big sister and my life would never be the same.  I began to learn about responsibilities and how the seemingly smallest things could be the biggest help.  I was introduced to the world of diapers and bottles, and quickly became proficient at both.  I found out that being the oldest girl was to be my mother's right hand - literally.  

My sister's were enough younger than I to make our being socially interactive difficult.  We never shared friend groups or makeup tips or hobbies, for that matter.  I was grown and out of the home before they were even out of elementary school.  But, that would come later.  

I was always sort of put in charge when my parents were gone so I think my role was more of pseudo-parent as opposed to sibling.  But I did it with gusto with often dismal results.  Brenda was short like myself so, as long as I was still at home, I was taller than her (she would pass me up eventually.)  Tina, however, was not short at all and towered over me before I knew it!  We still laugh at my efforts to try to get her to go to bed on time, with me standing with one hand on my hip and the other wagging a finger UP at her saying, "Now, I mean it!  Go to bed!"  And her pulling herself up to her fullest height and simply looking DOWN at me and saying, "Make me!!"  We'd start to tousle a bit - well, I'D start to try to tousle with her to make her get into the bed, but all she really had to do was firmly plant her feet on the ground and I couldn't budge her an inch!  She'd start to chuckle, which would make me mad, and I'd try harder.  Ultimately, though, she'd end up in bed, not because I harnessed some sort of super human strength and overpowered her, but because her chuckle would grow into outright laughter and she'd collapse onto the bed in a fit of giggles and I along side of her!  Lucky for me, Tina was never interested in giving me grief, which she surely could have.  Outside of me scolding her for always having her nose in a book I don't think we had many squabbles.  We were too busy trying to keep Brenda from doing things like paint the walls with poo, dumping the contents of yet another drawer into the fish tank, and sneaking various reptiles into the bathtub (which she usually shared with Tina.)  Brenda was constant motion - Tina was pensive.  Brenda, at age 2, strolled our neighborhood in Arizona buck-naked - we found her swinging on the swing a la Lady Godiva.  Tina would be furious if she even thought you might see her "naked."  Heck, forget naked.  She didn't even want to be seen in her undies!

I learned all of my mothering skills on these two girls.  Heaven help them!  I would find that these skills would be needed many times over during the rest of my life!

1967 is known as the "Summer of Love."  It certainly was for me - but not because of reckless abandon.  Quite the opposite.  It was when I learned the importance of responsibility and hard work and discipline.  I found the joy of a job well done.  I realized that others depend on you for things both physical and emotional.  I never realized before now how the 60's were considered the liberating years.  But, for me, when everyone else was cutting loose, I was hunkering down. Do I regret this?  Not at all!  I was finding love - not by turning inward but by serving others. These songs served as the background to this new life.  They mean something different to others, perhaps, but to me, they mean love in the purest form!